Kokomo Tribune; Kokomo, Indiana

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July 17, 2009

DAY: There’s hope out there

It seems every day we hear of people who just could not take life anymore and decided to end theirs.

Now, before we get into that discussion, I have to make this statement. None of us can possibly know how much of a burden another might be carrying. So we cannot fathom how much that load on their shoulders might weigh.

But this writer has to say right now that I feel that no burden is that heavy that an end to a life is the only way out.

Now as you know, I am not a doctor, nor am I a minister. But I am a person who could have dropped off the deep end if not for those special people who would not let me get that far down. Those people know whom I am referring to.

This writer has endured the loss of a 34-year-old daughter almost 15 years ago to cancer and that, my friends, is a heavy burden to carry. But I had family and many good friends who just would not let me get down.

I had several at Sears who were there to tell me that I had to go forth and live my life with the memories of the times when Patty was still with us. Bless their hearts for keeping me going until that time when I could get on with my life. There is no closure, but there are better days ahead to live.

As a believer, killing oneself is a sin, and that in itself is the main reason for not doing it. There are things that happen to all of us that seem to get worse as we get older. But that is the time to change over to a new way of dealing with it.

I have learned to live one day at a time, and not take today’s problems into tomorrow. The one thing that I have found out is that most of those who took that way out would not have if only they had tried to talk with a good friend or someone who had gone through the same thing.

Of course, many times a person will notice a big change in a good friend, but do not take the time to find out what might be wrong. Many times, just talking with a minister could be a great step toward putting your life back on track. Sometimes just changing your everyday habits helps. Do things that please you.

All I can tell those who feel that they are ready to end it all is to do something fast before the burden gets to heavy. I personally have known several men who felt that they had no other recourse, and we read their obits in the paper.

Take a walk sometime and look around you. You will find people who have handicaps either from birth or from accidents and the wars. You won’t see them feeling sorry for themselves as they go about their lives.

Take a trip through the children’s hospitals and see those kids smiling because someone is taking the time and knowledge to help them adjust to the days and years ahead.

This writer wants to let you know that help can be on the way if only you ask for it. A friend is there in case you need them. And God is up there looking through his books and seeing that you still have a lot of time here on earth if you just give him a chance to work with you.

There is only a split second between life and death, and that belongs to God. This writer can tell you that life is not easy, but it is the only game in town.

I have pain all over my body. Many times I gripe about it, but I can live with it. I say thanks at bedtime and thanks when I wake up. The ball is in God’s court. Try to live today for tomorrow.

• Ray “Uncle Ray” Day is a weekly contributor to the Kokomo Tribune. Contact him at uncleray@earthlink.net or (765) 457-3819.

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