I put on the coffee pot just as the doorbell rang.
“I’ll get it honey,” I shouted to the Mrs., “that’s Emil. We’re going to have another ‘top this’ news story contest.”
Marylu offered to join us for the event. I was surprised, since I thought she had no interest in such a contest. I certainly didn’t mind. If she was bored, so be it: after all, she was getting the worst of it when she married me.
“Come on in, Emil. I’m ready to go – but I just plugged in the coffee pot,” I explained, nearly tripping over a throw rug.
“Ed,” Emil commented as he sat, “you are the only person I know who has an electric percolator. Why do you like it so much?”
“Well,” I explained, “First, I like my coffee hot, and percolators bring the water to a boil. Second, cheap coffee tastes good in a percolator, third, I don’t have to buy filters. And fourth, I like to hear it perk.”
“Funny,” he replied, “I thought you did that to irritate the gourmet crowd with their French presses and Kenyan A gourmet coffees.”
“That’s reason number five,” I confessed with embarrassment. “Anyhow, bring any articles worthy of the challenge?”
“Sure do,” Emil responded. Here’s one from the New York Times. You can now buy a home solar-power system at Honda. They have a deal with SolarCity; I guess if you buy a Honda, you can also buy a solar system to provide electricity for your home. Let me read the article to you:
“‘In a typical arrangement, a company provides a system at little or no cost in exchange for a long-term contract in which the customer pays a fixed fee for the electricity generated, set at less than the customer would pay for power from the local utility. The solar price often rises over the life of the agreement, which can last 20 years.’”
“Wow,” I replied, “Things are really changing.”
“Not that much,” chimed in Marylu. “My mother had a solar powered clothes dryer before I was born?”
“Really?” Emil spoke with surprise.
“Yep,” Marylu replied. “It was called a clothes line.”
“Okay, let’s move on” (after all, she stole that joke from me, and, since I can’t remember who I stole it from, I consider it mine). “Now it’s my turn. How about this one from the Sideshow?
“A California lawyer said guards in a San Diego jail forgot about him—and that he was trapped for hours inside a locked waiting room.
“‘I know it takes a while to get the people, so I’m patient,” Lopez said. “I don’t have my cellphone with me because the policy is you can’t use a cellphone inside.’
“After a half an hour, however, Lopez became concerned and tried to alert guards using an intercom...
The lawyer spent more than four hours inside the locked waiting room before a guard heard him and unlocked the door.”
“Crazy,” Emil replied. “Pretty good article. And I’m proud of you. You resisted the temptation to throw in a crummy lawyer joke.”
“I’ve got an article!” Marylu offered. This time I was shocked! Marylu rarely competes with me, but when she does, I am doomed.
“Let’s hear it,” Emil responded while I grieved my imminent loss.
“This is from UPI,” she offered:
“A 101-year-old man who has been in nine marathons since taking up distance running when he was 89 said he retired after a weekend race in Hong Kong.
“Fauja Singh, whose running and style of dress earned him the title ‘Turbaned Tornado,’ said Sunday’s 6.2-mile race was his final competitive run, CNN reported Monday. Singh said he completed the Hong Kong event in 32 minutes and 28 seconds, shaving 4 minutes off his time from last year.”
“I can’t believe that!” I gasped. How can a 101 year old man run that fast?”
Emil changed the tone: “And I think we know who won the contest.”
I smiled. Both Emil and I were gracious losers.
Ed Vasicek is pastor of Highland Park Church and a weekly contributor to the Kokomo Tribune. Contact him at edvasicek@att.net.
Opinion
Vasicek; ‘Top this’ news story contest turns up some winners
- Opinion
-
-
Prepared for a disaster?
Put together a disaster plan and make sure everyone in your family knows what the plan is.
-
Move over, Ind. drivers
Keep highway and utility workers safe; remember to pull over for utility vehicles.
-
May 18, 2013: Cheers & Jeers
Commissioner earns respect of inmates
Kyle Stacy sends this Cheer for Howard County Commissioner Paul Wyman:
-
House of Burgess: The revolution will be printed
Another major milestone in the history of 3D printing was reached earlier this month when Cody Wilson, director of the nonprofit Defense Distributed, announced he had conducted the first-ever successful test firing of a completely 3D-printed gun in (where else?) Texas. Wilson then uploaded the plans online. These files were then downloaded over 100,000 times over the next 48 hours. That was, until the State Department intervened.
-
Hayden: From good to great in education
On the campaign trail last year and early into his administration, Indiana Gov. Mike Pence said repeatedly that his goal as governor would be to take Indiana from “good to great.”
-
Mom’s simple advice still presents a valuable challenge
Most moms don’t base their advice on scientific research. Instead, their words of wisdom come from a greater source — the heart, where they store and process life experiences. Unfortunately, some folks don’t receive the gift of maternal guidance, for various reasons.
-
Wolfsie: Making bird calls
One afternoon in 2011, my friend Eric spent a couple of hours over lunch explaining Twitter to me and I thought I understood it all, but as you’ll see from my first few tweets, I wasn’t very confident: “Is anyone getting this?”
-
Letter to the Editor: May 13, 2013
Good people wouldn’t do this to their neighbors. This common refrain is being heard over eastern Howard County where industrial development is planned for our farmland in the form of massive wind turbines.
-
Vasicek: Mother’s Day stresses
For two hours, the lady sitting next to another airplane passenger boasted about her grandchildren, producing a barrage of photographs. She finally realized that she had been talking the whole time, so she tried to make amends:
“Oh, I am sorry! I have monopolized the conversation. I will listen to you now. So please tell me: what do you think of my grandchildren?” -
Letters to the Editor: May 12, 2013
How fortunate, that after years of trying to bring top-notch wind energy companies to Tipton County, this great choice is here for us — just at the right time. Tipton County badly needs the revenue from clean wind farm companies.
- More Opinion Headlines
-
Prepared for a disaster?
Looking for Love? Take the Prague Metro
Crews Race to Find Survivors of Okla. Twister
First Person: Baby Falcons on a New York Bridge
Oklahoma: Images of Devastation, Reunion
Reunited Dad, Son: 'We Just Praise God'
Slow Pokes: Acupuncture Helps Sick Turtles
Moore, Okla. City of Reunions, Tears After Storm
Former IRS Chief: Can't Say How List Happened
Gov. Fallin: Okla. Facing Horrific Disaster
Tim Cook Defends Apple's Tax Accounting
AP Photograher: 'It Was a Miracle' They Got Out
Raw: Crews Search for Survivors of Okla. Tornado
Raw: Tearful Reunion After Okla. Tornado
OKC Hospital Describes Treating Tornado Wounded
Obama Pledges Urgent Aid for Tornado Victims
Raw: Massive Funnel Clouds in Oklahoma
